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"Stop comparing"~ your child

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Why do we constantly compare our kids with their siblings or other children*?* Whether it is their grades, sports performance, or careers, why do other kids become the benchmark for measurement?

While our intentions may be pure and we may simply want to nudge our kids to do better— often, comparison results in the opposite. It steals joy. It increases anxiety and stress levels while lowering their self-esteem.

The kids get discouraged and feel like nothing is enough. As a result, they might even stop trying and develop resentment for their peers!

Here are some tips to stop comparing and improve your bond with your child:

  • Be mindful of your words. Often, we immediately go into a judgmental zone without analyzing and understanding the actual problem.
  • Track your child's individual progress. Use their own previous performance as a benchmark to measure their progress. Eg: He could barely read a sentence last month, now he can read an entire paragraph.
  • Talk about their improvements. Never give only negative feedback, they are also trying their best. Praise their efforts. It boosts self-esteem and encourages your child to do better. Then, plan together to improve their skills!

It's important for each parent to realize that it's not only about the result, but also the process your child goes through and who they become as an individual!

So, let's encourage our kids to set their own standards, be intrinsically motivated, and put 'the comparison trap' to bed!

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